I was in a used bookstore here in Bellingham over the weekend. A title in the religion section caught my eye while browsing: The Politically Correct Guide to the Bible by Edward P. Moser. I decided to liberate the title from the prison of musty used bookstore shelves. Oh, and it was cheap.

Here's a snippet:

Eve and Adam's Patriarchal Oppressor

And lo, it was a sexist thing to make a man before a womyn. But God fancied making man after his own image. Perhaps he wanted company, having pretty much been on his own for five billion years. The deity breathed into Adam's nostrils the breath of life, pushed hard upon his chest, applied the electric shock-paddles of life, and man became a living being. God placed his creation in a garden lush with fruit, which raised moral dilemmas about eating fruit. For mangoes and figs have feelings too, as evidenced by their strong response to stimuli like sunlight and recorded music.

The deity told Adam, “Behold, I have given you herb-bearing seed, and its grass is upon the face of all the earth,” and Adam experienced temporary memory loss, and fashioned the Middle East's first hookah. (Moser, 19-20)

It goes on. Some parts are hilarious, others are trying too hard. It is broken into short chapters so reading can be stretched out; there is also no need to read it consecutively.